Or is it a myth?
Do we women have “mother’s instinct” that makes us better parents, are we more able to anticipate the wishes and problems that our children may have?
Are men just as capable – if given the chance?
Obviously, it is an incredible generalisation because there are good fathers and bad fathers, good mothers and bad mothers, but what do you think?
Often I will read or hear from friends statements such as, “Oh, I could not leave my husband in charge all weekend – he would not cope”. I even know families where the husband, “doesn’t do nappies”, as if there is a skill involved.
It seems to me that many women don’t give their husbands the opportunity to prove that they can cope with the children, particularly babies. “I am better off doing it myself, it takes him so long to do it” – as if that is a solution.
When our son was born, I was terrified of changing his nappy. I had no idea where to start, our first child was a girl. Seems silly now, but what if my husband had said, “What are you like? Never mind, it will be quicker if I do it, you will just make a mess and I will have to do it again myself”.
Where does this idea come from that we women are better, are more able to recognise danger? Just because our fear threshold is lower than our husbands? I had to learn to bite my tongue and say nothing when my husband was in charge of our children. Even now I sometimes butt in and start to give my opinion when I can clearly see that he is coping with whatever situation has come up. No wonder that some men give up and don’t bother any more.
We have to step back and let our husbands take charge, indeed encourage them to do so. Enough of the Mummy Martyrdom. Give Dads their day.